Oh, life can be so very hard at times. Ignore the beer belly kids in Africa or people in wheelchairs for a moment and allow yourself to be aware of your own problems.
Because you have a problem as well, a serious problem: You have already acquired a good base tan, the pedicure and manicure was done two days ago, your choice of attire is an itsy bitsy tiny bikini, the brazilian is in place and the makeup is perfectly applied. You lie on the beach to let your wonderful self soak up the sun, but there is a big problem: The boys won’t leave you alone.
Hello! You live in 2007. You have the right to be a stunning beauty showing off without having silly boys pestering you with stupid pick-up lines. Here's 5 strategies for girls who just want to have fun, alone:
1. Sunglasses
Oversized sunglasses. Do not leave home without it. You need big big black sunglasses. When you wear them you will project the attitude of an arrogant and unapproachable woman. Downside: You will not be able to sigh and roll your eyes to your ugly girlfriends when complaining about the attention from the boys.
2. You and your oily body are perfectly fine, thank you
Re-apply tanning oil frequently. You are a sun-goddess and only use sun protection factor 4 or less. The other creams are too thick and do not look as good on your skin as the oily SPF 2 of your choice. You re-apply it every 30 minutes to show the boys that you definitely do not need any help with your sunscreen.
3. Concentrate on those pages
Read a book or magazine. With your eyes fixated on the pages the boys will hesitate to approach you.
4. Use iPod to ignore
Use an iPod, but hide the headphones under your hair if you can. Then if a boy comes up to you to use a stupid pick up-line you can just smile contemptuously and point to your ears without saying anything. I am sure he will disappear quickly.
5. Throw their beach-volleyball away
When the boys lose their beach-volleyball and it bounces your way, do this: First sigh, then remove sunglasses and roll eyes, then look irritated, and finally throw the ball away from you, but not back to them. You will look so unapproachable, arrogant and cool!