The secrets of being a Wicked Weasel babe

Ah… Wicked Weasel.. this wonderful Australian bikini company who started the micro bikini category a few years ago. We men have so much to thank them for! But wait a minute, if you happen to be a woman and want to stand out at the beach, don’t order that sizzling little bikini yet, read my tips first:

Go away fatties.
I have a beer belly which makes it impossible for me to wear a Speedo or anything else tight fitting to the beach because I will end up looking ridiculous. If you are a fat woman, a micro bikini will have the same effect. You will look like dog poop. Better get that Anne Cole bathing suit instead.

Pale skin is a sin
A tiny bikini show off all your flesh. Razor burns, spots, bruises whatever. If you are tanned these malfunctions will not be as visible. Also: Tan is sexier than pale.

Wear it with pride
So you are wearing the sexiest and most high profile outfit on the beach? What do you do? Try to hide? No, you can’t wear a micro bikini and go around feeling uncomfortable. Walk with pride and enjoy all the men’s eyeballs on your body.


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  • Jackson
    30 Dec 2007 | Permalink | Reply

    So, your a guy, who likes to tell fat women to hide, pale women to not be pale, and women with large breats to show them off.

    What are you 'hello' magazine?

  • Andrew
    30 Dec 2007 | Permalink | Reply

    Yeah basically you vomitted yoour congealed thoughts onto a webpage and tried to pass it off as an interesting article. Keep swinging for the parking lot there champ.

  • George
    30 Dec 2007 | Permalink | Reply

    Good work, take heed people.

  • M. Ball Sack
    31 Dec 2007 | Permalink | Reply

    I laugh at your stereotypical macho behaviour!

  • angele
    31 Dec 2007 | Permalink | Reply

    Women who wear shit like this deserve to hear everything every person says about them, good or bad.
    Don't be a slut, save something for his imagination.

  • tj
    2 Jan 2008 | Permalink | Reply

    he is right…large women should not wear any type of clothing like this…less that is reviled. the less i vomit

  • d
    10 Jan 2008 | Permalink | Reply

    ok, here we have it all: the article writer who is a sexist prig, the commentators ready to cast aspersion upon women (they must be sluts if they wear this, right?) and the righteous willing to be, well nothing less than. The article sucks but the responses raise some really interesting questions and make for great reading!

  • Mags
    20 Mar 2008 | Permalink | Reply

    I have been a WW fan for the last 6 years, and counting – I believe what you are saying is INCORRECT!! Thats why WW is sucha fantastic brand – they dont promote this for models only, its for everyone. Hence their HUGE SUCCESS in the industry. I have a slim figure, fair enough, but if you do not own a ww you will not even imagine what it does for your self asteem. Women, of all shapes and sizes, transform when they wear these gorgeous little numbers. it gives them confidence and makes them feel sexy, may they be a couple of pounds overweight. A woman oozes sex appeal if she is confident enought to wear one, even if she is not a model. I say screw your comments – Girls, go and buy one or 5, cause once you go Wicked, you will own nothing else in your cupboard! You are obviously only one for models and looks – pitty. And yes, I have been a model in my time…….your comments are small minded.

  • Skrap Nod
    26 Mar 2008 | Permalink | Reply

    I happen to prefer fair skinned women with freckles, no matter what they wear. Thank goodness for chocolate and vanilla.

  • Oprah is DUMB!!!
    2 Apr 2008 | Permalink | Reply

    the author does sound like an idiot, but come ON!!! If you are not keeping your body in top physical condition DON'T pretend like everyone is supposed to enjoy seeing it. I can admit that I DON'T have a body to show off, so I don't feel bad pointing out when other people don't either. Look I think Queen Latifa looks classy and beautiful. She wears her weight with style, but I don't want to see her in a wicked weasel even though I would go out with her. So everyone can shut up with all this "WEAR WHAT YOU WANT" CRAP!!! Be honest with yourself. If you've spent time in the gym and developed something you're proud of maybe this is for you. If you've spent years sitting on your ass and you are flabby (or worse) wear something a little more modest OR don't get your feelings hurt when everyone either laughs or vomits when you walk by. Thank you. That is all.

  • Keyth
    2 Feb 2009 | Permalink | Reply

    1) fat people are ugly. you shoudnt be like that, and yes, it is more than likely your own fault, lose some weight. and for gods sakes if you go out in public wear full clothing. women are meant to be concave, not convex.and guys are meant to have awsome ripped bodies. (im heading on my way there)
    2)if you look good, then yes, flaunt it. if you weigh less than 60-70 kilos, chances are you look good. otherwise your more than likely fat, in whichcase see 1.
    3) dont go too skimpy… leave guys something for the imagination… we dont like seeing all at once, an accidental nip slip is a lot hotter than a full on flop em out. (i dont advise either)
    4) while tans do hide scars etc… being pale is considerd hot too, dont forget that.

    but most of all
    fat people
    go to the gym
    and failing that
    go for a walk
    do some pushups
    dont scar the rest of us by making us look at your wibbly – wobblie gut
    “don’t get your feelings hurt when everyone either laughs or vomits when you walk by” very true, and i nearly did one day. dont kid yourself, i have seen people vomit because of fat people.

    your sickening

    ok thats my rant


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