- 08 - Strippers and drugs
08 - Strippers and drugs
- By Angelina X
- Published 08/19/2007
Angelina works as an exotic dancer in a holiday resort. She writes a diary for SunAndSin.com.
My life’s one wild ride these days
Ever since the first few days of ‘experimenting’ at Jenna’s, it seems my life has taken a turn – whether for the better or worse, I’m not quite sure. I just know that it feels really good, so it must be for the better! I haven’t tried anything other than pot, because even that’s enough for me to feel disconnected from the world. I don’t know if my entries make sense anymore, I always feel so buzzed.
A bigger and better looking club with new girls coming in
The club’s nearly completely finished with the renovations – and soon we’ll be bigger and better than ever, with more customers and a few more dancers. I’ve been asked to audition and train the new girls, which is flattering because I myself am still fairly new but I guess that’s the way the cookie crumbles in this world of mine. It’s all good; I can teach them the moves, but not all my signature ones. I still gotta be the top girl around here, one day my “Angelina” may become more popular than Jenna’s “Fantasia”.
I’ve stopped going to the gym, but I still feel like a million bucks
I think it’s because of the drugs, because I almost feel invincible. Nothing can hurt me, not even all that food I eat – I tend to throw it up later anyway because I feel way too guilty for eating so much when I should be taking care of my body. What a body it is, I love the way it feels underneath my hands, especially when I’m high – the tactile feeling of everything is amplified by a million. I don’t need the gym – I stopped going for a week and I lost 5 pounds anyway!
I need a man of my own – I hate sharing
Jenna is great and all, but I don’t want to share anything with her unless we’re too drunk and high to care. When daytime rolls around, I want a boyfriend who buys me breakfast and showers with me. I don’t want to be part of a “threesome couple” or whatever you call that type of relationship. Besides, I don’t think they see me in that light anyway – they have each other, and I’m just a toy aren’t I? Sometimes during sex, I swear Jenna looks at me in a funny way, like she hates me and doesn’t want me to be there. In the morning she totally loves me so I think it’s just my imagination, but I’m trying to be more careful now. I should go out on dates more often, maybe move in with my own boyfriend when I find a nice guy (if they even exist anymore!!)
Finding a new name, new persona, new gimmick
“Angelina” was created to project my inner-vixen who was bold and alluring, unlike the real me. But now, I feel that I am Angelina by day and someone else at night. It makes me want to create a whole new persona, a whole new look. Maybe leather instead of silk, handcuffs and whips instead of roses, bright red hair instead of medium brown. I don’t know what my name would be – how does “Saffron” sound? I think the new audience won’t know what to expect with my new persona and her brand new never-before-seen wild and sexy S&M routine. I can’t wait to show them what I’ve become.
08 - Strippers and drugs